Tuesday, March 3, 2009

Booty call, anyone???

Yes, that's exactly what I call going over to a guys house at 2 am. A booty call...nothing less, nothing more. Right?? Right!

That is unless your me...and you continually attract complete idiots.

Ok, so let's set the scene. I'd gone out with R one time. He was cute, had a nice smile and a great body. Probably not Mr. Right, but he certainly could have been Mr. Right Now.

A few days later our phone calls/texts had gotten pretty sexual and it seemed inevitable that we'd soon be sleeping together. Either that weekend or the following weekend (I can't remember) I was planning on hanging with my girls and their hubbies at one of their houses. Just so happened that R lived less than 10 minutes away from my friend's house.

It worked out great...we each had plans with friends scheduled for that night and it was decided that I'd head to his house when things at my gathering wound down. I warned him right away that I'd probably be fairly drunk and that there was no way I'd be done before midnight and more likely, 1 or 2 in the morning. He was game....or so I thought.

It had been a long night of drinking. I vaguely remember some of the texts we sent back and forth (some may or may not have been from my girls instead of me). Eventually I make my way to his condo.

Minimal small talk ensues. Kissing begins. Undressing begins. He's naked, my bra is long gone, I'm in my panties...sex is now a sure thing. Again...that is unless your me.

Me: 'Let's go to the bedroom."
R:'Umm...I need to go to my parents house to let their dogs out'
Me:'You're fucking kidding, right?'
R:'Well, no. They haven't been out all day.'

WHAT THE FUCK!!! I seriously got rejected because of a fucking dog. I mean, I know I'm no super model or anything, but give me a break. I have no idea what the hell that was all about...I mean he was clearly ready for action as was I. And really, what the hell else was the reason for having me come over at 2 am??? We're both adults...we both know what that type of visit means.

The funny part was...after hearing nothing from him in weeks, just 2 weekends ago he texts me again. A friend that was present the night of the previous incident happened to be playing a game on my phone when his text came through (I also happened to be in a room full of married women). After filling everyone in on most of the details (well, except those that involved us being naked and on top of each other) my friend replied something along the lines of "Booty call??"

I don't remember what happened from there on, but it was pretty damn funny. I don't know what he was thinking when he tried to get a hold of me a second time. No way in hell was I going for a repeat performance (or should I say lack of performance).

Alas...J's dry spell continued on...

5 comments:

quarter-life lady. said...

Oh my word. Are you kidding me? Wow. That sounds like a story straight from Sex and the City.

Ms. Florida Transplant said...

Ha! Letting the dog out at 2am. I'm going to remember that one for next time I need to bail on a date...

J said...

Quarter-life lady - God do I wish I was kidding...but nope. Another sad but true story!

Ms. Florida - That's exactly what I thought...until it happened to me :(

Dave Q. said...

That is messed up. Dude has got to be gay.

The Passionate Book Worm said...

Wow, Seriously unbelievable!